How to write an obituary: what to include, a fill-in template, and short examples
An obituary tells people that someone has died, gives the details of the service, and offers a short picture of the life they lived. It usually has to be written quickly, by someone who is grieving. This guide keeps it simple: the facts to gather, what to include and leave out, a template you can fill in, three short examples, and a checklist before it goes out.
On this page
1. Gather the facts
Before you write, collect the details in one place. Ask a second family member to check them, because names and dates are easy to get wrong in a hard week.
- Full name, including any nickname and maiden name if the family wants it used
- Age, the city where they lived, and the date and place of death
- Where they were born and grew up
- Schools, work, military service, faith community, clubs
- Marriage or partnership
- Family who survive them, and family who died before them, with names spelled correctly
- Service details: type, date, time and place, or a note that it will be private
- Where to send donations or flowers, if the family has a wish
If you want more than facts, ask two or three people for a favorite story or the thing they will remember most. The eulogy guide has questions that work for this.
2. What to include, in order
| Part | What it covers |
|---|---|
| The announcement | Full name, age, city, and when and where they died |
| Their life | Where they were born and grew up, their work, and what they loved, in a few sentences |
| Who they were | One or two details that show their character: a habit, a passion, something they were known for |
| Family | Who survives them, then who died before them |
| Service | Date, time and place, or a note that it will be private or held later |
| Donations | Where to give in their memory, if the family wishes |
| Thanks | Optional: a line thanking caregivers, a hospice or friends |
Scribe Media's guidance. Newspapers and funeral homes may have their own format and length limits; ask before you write.
3. What to leave out
- Details that help identity thieves. Obituaries are public. Many families leave out the exact birth date, the home address and the mother's maiden name.
- Anything a living relative would not want in print, including family conflicts.
- The cause of death, unless the family wants it included. "After a long illness" or "unexpectedly" is enough if you want to say something.
- A full résumé. One line on their work is usually plenty; the rest belongs in a eulogy or a longer tribute.
4. An obituary template
[Full name], [age], of [city], died [peacefully / unexpectedly / after a long illness] on [date] at [place], surrounded by [family, if true].
[He / She / They] was born in [place] to [parents' names] and grew up in [place]. [Schooling or service, one line.] [He / She / They] worked as [work] for [length of time].
[One or two sentences on who they were: what they loved, what they were known for.]
[Name] is survived by [spouse or partner], [children and their partners], [grandchildren], and [siblings]. [He / She / They] was preceded in death by [names].
A [funeral / memorial / celebration of life] will be held at [time] on [date] at [place]. [Or: A private service will be held.]
In lieu of flowers, the family asks that donations be made to [organization].
[Optional: The family thanks (names) for their care.]
5. Three short examples
We wrote these to show the range. None is about a real person. There are ten more, by relationship and length, in obituary examples.
Short, for a newspaper: "Margaret Ann Collins, 84, of Dayton, died peacefully on October 12 at home. A retired schoolteacher, she taught third grade for 31 years and never forgot a student's name. She is survived by her sons, David and Paul, and five grandchildren. A memorial service will be held at 11 a.m. on October 19 at her church."
Warmer, for a funeral home website: "Joe Rivera could fix anything with an engine and most things without one. He spent forty years running the garage his father opened, and half the town has a story about the time Joe stayed late to get them back on the road. He loved the Reds, his tomato garden and, above all, his wife of 52 years, Elena."
For a private service: "Dana Lee, 61, of Portland, died on October 3 after a long illness. Dana spent a career in nursing and a lifetime looking after everyone else. A private service will be held for family. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that donations be made to the hospice that cared for Dana."
6. Check it before it is published
- Every name spelled correctly, and every family member included who should be
- Dates, times and places for the service checked against what the funeral home has
- The donation organization's name exactly right
- Read aloud by a second family member before it goes out
- Length and price confirmed with the newspaper, if you are publishing in print
Keep a copy of what you wrote, and any stories you gathered. Families often want them later, and they are the start of something longer. How to make a family history book shows how to collect them.
Start here: fill in the first two lines of the template with the facts, then ask one person, "What is the thing about them you will remember most?"
Common questions
What should be included in an obituary?
The person's full name, age, where they lived, and when and where they died; the basic facts of their life, such as where they were born, their work and the people they loved; the family members who survive them and those who died before them; and the details of any service, plus where to send donations if the family wishes.
How long should an obituary be?
As long as the place it is published allows. Newspapers often charge by length or by line, so ask the funeral home or the paper before you write. Funeral home and memorial websites usually allow a longer version, so some families write a short one for print and a fuller one online.
Who usually writes the obituary?
Usually a close family member, often with help from the funeral home, which can also place it in newspapers and on its own website. Some people write their own in advance.
What should I leave out of an obituary?
Obituaries are public, so many families leave out details like an exact birth date, a home address and a mother's maiden name. Leave out anything a living relative would not want in print, and be careful with the cause of death unless the family wants it included.
What is the difference between an obituary and a death notice?
A death notice is a short, factual announcement of the death and the service details. An obituary tells more of the person's life story. Many families publish a short notice in the paper and a fuller obituary online.
Sources: steps, structure, template, checklist and examples written by Scribe Media for this guide; the examples are invented. Published by Scribe Media.