60 family history interview questions to ask your relatives, and how to record and check the answers
These questions go past one person's life to the family behind them: the names, where people came from, the ancestors nobody alive has met, the places, the work, and the papers in the drawer. They are in six themes of ten. Each theme asks for facts you can look up later and the stories that make them worth keeping.
On this page
Names (questions 1 to 10)
- What is your full name, and who were you named after?
- What were your parents' full names, including your mother's maiden name?
- What were your grandparents' full names, and what did you call them?
- Has our family name changed, been spelled differently or been shortened? Do you know why?
- Are there names that come back in every generation?
- Did anyone in the family go by a nickname so long that people forgot their real name?
- Were there children in the family who died young, and what were their names?
- Who married into the family, and what were their names before?
- Is there anyone in the family nobody talks about? What do you know about them?
- Who else in the family should I ask about names and dates?
Where the family came from (questions 11 to 20)
- Where were you born, and when?
- Where were your parents and grandparents born?
- What is the oldest place you know of that our family came from?
- Who was the first of our family to move here, and roughly when?
- Why did they leave? What were they hoping for?
- How did they travel, and who came with them?
- Who did they leave behind, and did they stay in touch?
- What language did they speak at home, and when did the family stop speaking it?
- Where did the family move after that, and why?
- Has anyone ever gone back to the old place? What did they find?
The people before us (questions 21 to 30)
- What do you remember about your grandparents: how they looked, sounded and spent their days?
- What did they tell you about their own parents?
- Which ancestor do people tell the most stories about? Tell me one.
- Who in the family was known for being strong, funny, difficult or brave?
- Did anyone serve in a war? Where, and what happened to them?
- Were there hard times the family lived through, like a depression, a war, an illness or losing a farm or business?
- How did people in the family usually meet and marry?
- How large were the families, and who raised whom?
- Is there a family story you have always wondered was true?
- Who do people say you take after, and why?
Homes and places (questions 31 to 40)
- What was the address, or the name of the road, of the house you grew up in?
- Walk me through that house, room by room.
- Where did your grandparents live? What do you remember about visiting?
- Was there a town, farm or neighborhood the family lived in for generations?
- Which church, school or cemetery is connected to our family?
- Where are your parents and grandparents buried?
- What was the town like then: the shops, the jobs, the people?
- Who were the neighbors, and how did the family get along with them?
- Which family homes are still standing?
- If we drove there today, what would you point out?
Work, faith and traditions (questions 41 to 50)
- What work did your parents and grandparents do?
- Was there a family business, trade or farm? What happened to it?
- What faith did the family practice, and how strictly?
- Which holidays mattered most, and what did they look like?
- Which recipes came down through the family, and from whom?
- What songs, sayings or prayers did the older generation use?
- What did the family believe about money, work and education?
- Were there family rules everyone knew without being told?
- Which traditions have we lost, and which have we kept?
- What do you think our family is known for?
Papers, photos and objects (questions 51 to 60)
- Is there a family Bible, album or box of letters? Who has it now?
- Who is in this photo, and when and where was it taken?
- Are there birth, marriage, naturalization or military papers in the family?
- What objects have come down through the family, and from whom?
- What is the oldest thing the family owns?
- Has anyone in the family already worked on a family tree? Where is it?
- Are there recordings, home movies or diaries?
- Which object would you save first, and why?
- Who should get these things next?
- What do you most want the next generation to know about where they come from?
Who to ask, and how to record it
- Start with the oldest relatives you can reach, and with whoever the family calls the keeper of the stories. End each interview with question 10: who else should I ask?
- Bring something to look at. A photo, a letter or a map gets more than a question alone. "Tell me about this" reaches memories that questions miss. Photograph each item and say on the recording what it is.
- One theme per sitting. Eight to twelve questions is plenty for an hour.
- Ask for the story behind each fact. "Why did they leave?" "What happened next?" "Who told you that?"
- Record it. Ask first, put your phone on something soft a hand's width or two away, in a quiet room, and say the date, your name and theirs at the start. The iPhone recording guide covers in-person, phone and video calls, and the recording setup guide covers rooms and backups.
- Back it up the same day, in two places.
Check the facts, keep the stories
Family memory is a starting point, not proof. Dates drift by a few years, names get simplified, and a good story can move from one great-uncle to another. That does not make the story worthless; it means you keep two lists.
- The story, as told. Keep the recording and the transcript as they are. How your family remembers something is part of its history.
- The facts to check. After each interview, write down every name, place and rough date mentioned, and who said it. Then look for them in records such as birth, marriage and death certificates, census returns, immigration and naturalization papers, military records and cemetery records.
When a record and a story disagree, note both. Sometimes the record is wrong too.
To get the recordings on paper, the transcription options guide compares software and human transcription, and the transcript to chapter guide shows how spoken stories become readable prose. For one relative's own life, see the life story interview questions and 75 questions to ask your grandparents.
Start here: take the "names" and "where the family came from" questions to your oldest relative, with one old photo, and record the conversation.
Common questions
What questions should I ask about family history?
Ask about names, places and people you can later look up: full names including maiden names, where and when people were born, where the family moved and why, what work they did, and which papers, photos and objects survive. Then ask for the stories behind them: "Why did they leave?" gets more than "Where were they from?"
Who should I interview first for family history?
Start with the oldest relatives you can reach, and with anyone the family calls the keeper of the stories. Then ask each person who else you should talk to. Cousins and in-laws often remember different versions, which is useful when you check the facts later.
How do I record a family history interview?
Ask first, then put your phone on something soft a hand's width or two from them, in a quiet room with the television off. Say the date, your name and theirs at the start, and back up the file the same day. A phone or video call works too; our iPhone guide covers all three.
Are family stories accurate?
Often partly. Dates drift, names get simplified and stories get attached to the wrong person. Record the story as it is told, write down the names, places and rough dates, and check them against records before you treat them as fact.
What is the difference between family history and genealogy?
Genealogy is usually the family tree: names, dates and how people are related. Family history adds the stories: why they moved, what their lives were like, what they believed. An interview gives you both, if you ask for facts and for stories.
Sources: questions, follow-ups and examples written by Scribe Media for this guide. Published by Scribe Media.